An Old Time Christmas

Well as you can tell with yesterday's post we
have change our focus here at the comedian
ranch. We have our sights set on the "most
wonderful time of the year". This is traditionally
a time of good will and generosity here. This
year we are praying for some just like a lot of
American families. I don't want to bring the
spirit down so let's enjoy some of my favorite
family memories of Christmas.
There was always a sense of wonder and excitement
in my home as I was growing up. Christmas was
a very special time of year. It meant practicing
the Christmas Carols that we were taught at church
and school. We always had special programs. I
really hated them to tell you the truth. The costumes
that Mom created were never quite what I had in
mind. The shepherd wearing a bath robe now come on.
It could have worked really but the slippers were a
little over the top. Every year meant buying new itchy
sweaters to wear at the school programs. Hey, I can't
think of anything more exciting than to slip on one of
those itchy things, sit in a gymnasium full of sweaty
classmates and pretend it was worth it to entertain everyone's
parents for the koolaid and cookie reward we got at the
end. I remember they went through a phase where they
gave out oranges. What the hell was that. You mean I did
all that work and endured my skin being scraped off for
a freaking orange. Thanks, but if I want one at home all I
have to do is ask. Great gesture.
I went to my daughter's school program and they gave
them nothing. Zero, zilch, nada. Oh, I forgot the round of
applause. The ovation might carry these kids through because
it built there self esteem and didn't rot their teeth. My
sweet Rosie was Mrs. Claus in the program. I admit Daddy had
to go get some Kleenex. When I am proud of my family I get
emotional yes. Sue the drug manufacturers if you don't like
it.
Speaking of school programs, I found out that the future
inmates of America are still working in the school system. I
saw one of their recruits pulling some kids hair during the play.
I love it. Why don't we cuff that kid now and he can learn all
he needs to know in "the system". He is headed there anyway.
A few final thoughts before I go. All of the school systems that
have banned this activity need to have their funding pulled.
Everyone that has become so sensitive to others religious, political,
and social views needs to get an orange for Christmas. Hey,
thanks for ruining it for the rest of us. I want to give you all a
very special gift for reading today.....here it is
Merry Christmas to all......